The super power of loving yourself enough to be hated
Tags: selflove

This weekend, I had the pleasure of doing some deep meditation work with a dear friend and spiritual brother. I’m not sure it’s like this for everyone, but for me to truly do my deepest and most powerful work, I have to share it with another person. It’s one thing to have a great idea or get an insight about my behavior, but it can be a totally transformational experience to bare your soul to another human being – to truly be seen – the good parts and the ugly parts. It’s definitely the most challenging work I’ve ever done but the benefits are more profound than anything else I’ve ever encountered.
Two very deep and core beliefs surfaced through the course of my meditation this weekend. The first was, “I don’t believe in myself.” Sometimes this thought is more evident in my life; sometimes it’s lurking in the shadows; but it’s a very old and core belief. One that was offered to me at a very young age that I decided to believe and never let go of. Well not anymore.
The second core belief that followed soon after was, “I have to love my soul enough to simultaneously allow someone to hate me.” Ugh…that was definitely not the challenge I wanted to get on a holiday weekend, but I also know this to be 100% true.
It’s no surprise these thoughts came in a perfectly matched pair. My practice reminds me that the two always originate from the one. Light and dark. Good and evil. Ying and yang are all dualistic concepts that help us orient ourselves in the world. But they all originate from the singularity of oneness. That oneness is self-worth, validation, love, and compassion. All the things entrepreneurs look for…just in all the wrong places.
What burgeoning founder doesn’t tell themselves, “I can’t wait to make my first million – I’ll be so happy when that happens.” Then they work their ass off achieving their biggest dream and at the finish line they’re just a burnt out, miserable, millionaire. From a very early age, we’re taught to seek purpose from our relationships, career, finances, society and our environment. It’s not until we hit the wall do secretly wonder, “there’s got to be a better way.”
So if those words have come out of your mouth or if you’re tired of your company bullying you every day into feeling like an imposter or a slave then come join us on a 5 day mindfulness retreat and learn a different way to think. Trust me, it’s not a new way of thinking – it’s about 4,000 years old – but it has completely changed my life. Today, I generate more self-worth from the inside out rather than outside in. Today, I can write a post like this knowing it’s my truth. And if you disagree or hate me for it, that’s ok because I love myself anyway.
What if you could love yourself enough to know that someone could hate you and you’d still be ok? That’s a pretty tall soapbox to stand on if you’re launching a new product or service.
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